When change blesses you to cohabitate with a person. Maybe a loved one, friend. Possibly a younger adult. Whomever, it is hard to see or go through struggle. A setback is difficult in general, whether its you or someone else. Your normal first instinct (especially if you are avoiding working on you) as a human is to help or shoulld i say try to fix the situation for them. So you will feel better. You read that correct. All your actions are for you. They benefit you in some way yes. They also raise your anxiety. Your soul can not be settled if you are constantly fixing problems making it impossible for you to feel peaceful. You surround yourself with termoil and devastation then termoil and devastation alonhative mode. Causing it to be nearly impossible to experience happiness for any extended amount of time. Being a helpmate is different than taking over so you can stop worrying. It’s like an addiction. FIrst you do small things. Your feel good energy that boosts that prideful feeling talks to those endorphins. Next thing you know without you this person could not survive if not but for you. Fact is they can and your “help” is only hindering them. Making them feel like you don’t have faith in them. Maybe they don’t need as much as you do to feel satysfied. In Gods time they will find their place. Not in our time frame and terms. You never know but your not supposed to. Being an accesible to help is positive. Loosing who you are and focusing on everything but you, not so much.
1st Rule: Check yourself often
2nd Rule: Remind yourself everyone won’t be happy all the time. That includes you
3rd Rule: Compromise. Don’t think of it as not getting what you wanted. Think of it as being half way happy.
4th and final rule: Remind yourself daily expressing your concerns is acceptable. Helping someone occasionaly or for a season is fine. You never know when you may need someones help. But controlling the situation however is not.
BrokenWingSociety 