M ARCH 22nd 2023
This week in our book “Let That Shi*t Go” we focus on being ready for the things in life that engulf us; break us down. Follow through all the emotions of the process because thats where you find the good stuff. There will be times in life, no matter how positive and together you are., that are going to knock you down for a bit and take a minute to recover from. They engulf you and cause your energy tank to burn out. These things require a mourning process of what was and an opening (if you are willing ) of what could be.
DEATH OF A LOVED ONE DIVORCE JOB LOSS FINACIAL CHANGES MARRIAGE BIRTH OF A CHILD MOVING CHRONIC ILLNESS EMOTIONAL DISTURBANCES
These are a few events that are life changing. Any change brings angst, as it should. It’s unfamiliar and scary. But until you try and continue to try it will never become normalcy.
(www.verywellmind.com) Not to mention if you are one of the many people who struggle staying positive or have a fear of engulfment then you have a even larger challenge to overcome. Fear of engulfment is a fear of being controlled, dominated, or “losing themselves” in a relationship. This fear often comes ffrom growing up ihn a an emeshed family. A trait of family dysfunction, that involves poorly defined or non exsistent boundaries. Unhealthy relationship patterns and a lack of independence among family members.
(www.online-therapy.com) SIGNS OF ENMESHMENT:
- YOU PRIORITIZE OTHER PEOPLES NEEDS FIRST
- YOU ISOLAGTE YOURSELF FROM OTHER RELATIONSHIPS
- YOU DON’T HAVE BOUNDARIES
- YOU HAVE DIFFICULTY DIFFINTIATING BETWEEN YOUR EMOTIONS AND OTHERS
- YOU FIND DISAGREMENS DIFFICULT
- YOU LACK A SENSE OF SELF
According to http://www.psychcentral.com there are four components of revising enmeshment and becoming a healthier, more authentic you.
- Set boundaries, learning to set boundaries is imperative if you are going to change enmeshment relationships
- Discover who you are. Enmeshment prevents you from developing a strong osense of self
- Stop feeling guilty
- Get Good Support All these things are key in grieving and in life. Don’t look back thinking about what could have been. Yesterday is gone but today is yours for the taking . Feeling sorry for oneself never accomplished anything good. Embrace the now and what can be, focus, set goals and move forward. Do it now instead of having to deal with it later. When you become so overwhelmed and you cant take it anymore it’s time to take a break and fill your energy tank back up. It can be as big as a mini vaca, sleepover with a girlfriend, dinner and a movie. The old standby will always be a hot bath and a good book. Whatever relaxes you and re-fills your energy tank and allows you to recenter. Throughout life you are going to have difficult tasks. Having a positive attitude and a good support group is key for when the sh*t hits the fan. Knowing when you have had enough and who you are. You got this and it will bring you one step closer to your bliss
BrokenWingSociety 