HAPPY vs HAPPINESS

FEBUARY 1st 2023

What does being in a state of happiness mean to you? When you think of do you think of things that bring moments of pleasure or do you vision contentment that grows as you grow. According to a article in Psychologytoday.com, feeling happy and being happy are not the same. Feeling happy is a fleeting feeling; an emotional joy/pleasure. Having happiness is more of a deeper sense of well being, safety, bliss etc. In an article titled “life skills” at http://www.gsgms.org it states scientist have found that the three things that make humans the happiest are:

Pleasure: Doing things you enjoy

Engagement: Being interested in your activity and creating connections with others

Meaning: Feeling like what you do/have done makes a difference

There are two types of happiness

  1. Eudaimen well being – happiness that is connecte toa sense of purpouse or life meaning
  2. Hedenic well being – happiness that comes from self gratification. No purpouse just a response to a stimuls or behaviou

Whatever you are seeing it can be found. There is a old saying “Where attention goes energy flows”. When we are elated our body makes energy from the excitement so we can find more. Plain and simple acting happy will make you happy. Accorind to the Dalhi Lama there are six keys to keep to find happiness.

  1. Being Thanful – Happiness is not tangebale. It comes from you and your actions
  2. Rising above anger & hatred – Anger is your u;timate obstacle. It will destroy your own piece of mind
  3. Conquering Negative Thoughts – The real hero is the one that can move past his own anger and hatred
  4. Compassion: Our main purpouse in this life is to help. others. If you cant help them at least don’t harm them
  5. Getting in touch with spirituality when we get in touch wit our spiritual side we can discover the great happiness we have inside ourselves
  6. Shifting your perspective – Optomism has you look at situations and others optimistically allowing you to understand, mayb e ease some of the frustration and enjoy your peace. Everyone should wake up daily, strive to be there best. Share their talents and show gratiude for them. Pay it forward when you can. And always view your cup half full. Remember its a state of mind. All you have to do is want it and work for it We have the right to pursue happiness; meaning “YOU” have the right to create it for yourself. No where does it say you should be happy, or have the right to be happy. It just states you and you alone can have a mindset to be happy. Only you know if you want a life of happiness or if you are content with happy momens. Everyone is unique so there is no wrong choice to make. Whatever works for you.

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Post 50

ETHICS

JANUARY 25th 2023

Moral: What you decide you will or won’t do
Value: Worth of something and the impact it will have on you


Morals can be swayed by your surroundings (people and things). Studies have shown proof your enviroment can change your morals and values.
MORAL’S matched with VALUE’S
1)Responsibility – Help Others
1)Power – Capability
2)Compassion – Love for All
2) Loyalty and Compassion for others without worry of nationality or allegiances
3)Generosity – Pay it forward
3)Stimulation – The act of desire, interest or exhileration
4)Grattitude – Cooperation
4)Tradition – Being passed on in a certain way
5)Honesty – Be Brave
5)Self – Direction – Thinking for yourself instead of following others
6)Hard Work – Learn from Superiors
6)Achievment – Something completed succesfully. Usually with great effort, courage or skill
7)Kindness – Divide your resources fairly
7)Benevolance – Kindness
8)Respect – Do yourself right and others
8)Conformity – Behaviour in accordance with socially acceptable compliance with rules and laws

These definitions were pulled from the web page of the University of Oxfords (www.ox.ac.uk) Story Title: Seven Moral rules found all around the world. Universal Morals that coincide with the 10 Basic Values (according to http://www.frontier.in.org). Only eight of the ten are listed above. The last two have no equal. They stand alone and can’t be done in unison. They are dissonant. Lacking harmony, clashing, unusual in combination. With one in play the other can not be done. Number Nine is Hedonism; self indulgence. Number Ten is Security; free from danger or threat. If you choose self indulgence you will never be free from fear or threats. http://www.huffpost.com states the five main values of life are:


VALUE OPPOSITE OF
⦁ INTEGRITY DIS – HONESTY
⦁ ACCOUNTABILITY CARELESSNESS
⦁ PERSERVERENCE IRRESOLUTION
⦁ DISCIPLINE NON – DISCIPLINE


All of which equal dedication and education. Knowledge is power. To keep knowledge takes dedication and education. When in doubt of what to do, do your best at being you. When all else fails refer to the Ten Commandments (KJV) found in Exodus 20: 2-17 & Deuteronomy 5: 6-21.
1) You should have no other God’s before me.
All God asks from us is to take care of self and show kindness to all. Don’t confuse this with being used. You can love other things, just not more than you love ourselves. If you follow this rule nothing can be put before God.
2) You shall not make Idols
Again if you are doing what we disscussed in #1……
3) You shall not take the Lord’s name in vain.
Self explanatory
4) Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.
Self explanatory
5) Honor your father and mother.
Don’t confuse honor; high respect, with obeying. These are two different things.
6) You shall not murder
Self explanatory
7) You shall not commit adultry
Self explanatory
8) You shall not steal
Self explanatory
9) You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
Don’t do wrong to others. Treat every situation with a good heart and an open but cautious mind.
10) You shall not covet (want to posses or have).
Be thankful for what God has provided you with and honor him by sharing it with others instead of being unhappy with what you don’t have.
*Keep in mind that the Ten Commandments were in the old testament. Jesus died on the cross for us because it was known we were a creation with faults. I think the Commandments are a good byline but not to be “set in stone” per say after the new testament. If you do your best daily and make your choices with a greatfull heart you will have done what God has asked of you. Be the best person you can be and use your time wisely while permitted to be on this earth. If you can do that and overcome hidonism you will gain the security you are seeking.

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49th Post

GOALS

                                 JANUARY 17TH 2023

Taking a course or action of accountability to refine is important. All the tools we have disscussed are crucial. Before you can start at all you must have a goal, action, task in mind. This can be as simple as making your bed every morning to changing your perception about something/someone. Maybe you have a room you want to remodel, buy a car. Even choosing to have a child is a goal. It’s a desire you decide you’re going to manifest. Once your goal is decided it must be broke down into small tasks. Again small tasks equal accomplishments. According to fastcompany.com when you set a goal it releases neurotransmitting dopamine into the brain therefore motivating you to start action. The larger the goal the bigger the dopamine spike. Research proves the dopamine wains down. This is why you set the plan for your goal while the dopamine is high, then proceed with slow and steady progress. Goals can be accomplished but your success depends on you.
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POST – 48

COMMITMENT

JANUARY 16TH 2023

We have touched on refining one change at a time. Why it’s important to take inventory of “your” life frequently. Keeping what was positive, discarding what was not. What respect looks like when given to self. How others will begin to respect you when you respect yourself. Your uniquness that was given to you for you to share, Boundaries and accountability for all of this. How to stay the course and make these habits instead of hopes. The main ingredient is commitment. This is to state or quality of being dedicated to a course and the action. Notice the word quality. The quality of commitment you give will be the quality of your results. This represents the level of your self – discipline/self – commitment . Your follow through on your promise (to self) to complete your intended action, accountability, follow through. This will take desire and dedication. Without the want in your soul it will be hard to complete these tasks. According to Carjiescott.com there are three types of self – discipline/self – commitment. Activiie, reactive, and proactive.

  • active: what you need in the moment (choosing to eat healthy, removing distracitionw to commplete a task, go to bed intstead of staying up).
  • reactive: your thoughts or behaviours when dealing with unforseen situations (a encounter with a rude person, a flat tire, locking your keys in the car).
  • proactive: getting ahead of a situation to better control it (taking a umbrela if it’s supposed to rain, creating a to-do-list, bringing a jacket when weather is going to get cold).

These are opportunities given to you. They grow patience and teach you how to handle things without allowing it to effect you. Commitment to yourself (and others) shows you have self – discipline, persistence, and resilluiance. Meaning you choose to do what’s right, show up, show interest, focus and empathize without being asked or expecting anything in return. To ensure a better chance at keeping your commitments to yourself, once you know your goal announce it. This guarantees accountability.

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BOUNDARIES

JANUARY 13TH 2023

The way you percieve yourself is exactly how others will treat you. To fully refine yourself you need a healthy self-worth. The higher your self-esteem the more aware of you that you become. Once you start the process there is no going back. Clarity on your faults and needs will be to obvious. This is how you find your limits/deal breakers. Gaining understanding of what boundaries need to be set for you and others. Basic, respectfull guidlines that allow others to be aware of how you expect to be treated. There are six major places we set boundaries. Emotional, Physical, Sexual, material, time and workplace. To keep all lines clear there will be times confrontation must occur. It’s easier to push your feelings to the side for someone else to be happy; It keeps you free from confrontation. But it’s not healthy nor beneficial for you. Use your energy on your own peace not someone elses. Anyone who respects you will respect your boundaries. You don’t need anything in your life that doesn’t sit well wit your soul.

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POST 46

RESPECT

JANUARY 12TH 2023

Without self-worth itis unlikely you will have much change in your life. Belief in ones self is needed to figure out your strengths, desires, and needs. Being diffident only stifles and stagnates you. To have others treat you with high regard then you must view yourself highly/respect yourself. People are going to treat you exactly the way you feel about yourself. Many confuse a healthy self – esteem with being conceited. The difference between the two is a person with a healthy self – esteem will admit their wrongs and knows there is always room for improvement. A conceited person, however, will not admit fault much less weakness. Viewing yourself in a positive way will feel foreign at first. Possibly even a uncomftorable. That’s the trepadation that allows you confirmation that you are growing. It’s a good thing. Think of your closest loved ones. You wish nothing less for them then to be heard, empathized with, and admired. Start treating yourself exactly like that. The higher the pride tank becomes filled, the easier making decisions for yourself will be. The clarity will be obvious. Just like the song R-E-S-P-E-C-T states R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to me”. You are the one that decides. Remind yourself that you are the greatest project you will ever work on. Do you right, respect yourself.

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ROUTINE

JANUARY 11TH 2023

For most people it’s difficult to stay on task if they don’t have a regiment to follow. Focus and goals equal accountability and accomplishment. Most need the stability that comes with structure or they find it difficult to complete projects. Having spontanaity is healthy on occasion, almost needed. Routine, however, is needed if you are looking to progress forward. Setting up the steps so you know the plan before you start it. Spontanaity brings a quick adrenaline burst of satisfaction. It feels good. Routine brings long term pleasure and self worth. Both together give a balance you need. Stick with small changes. One mission at a time is the road to peace before you reach your finish line. Don’t’ go through life focusing on struggles. Take control and plan what you want and how you will do it. Once you start utilizing your time and efforts and decide and outcome the task is much easier to undertake. You don’t have to generate a full proof method, just a guide. There will be changes to be made along the way. Vearing off course for a minute is different than heading in a different direction. It’s not if it happens its when it happens. It’s nearly impossible for your original plan to be followed from top to bottom the way it was written. This is why its vital to do daily self checks. Evaluate where you failed and where you succeded. What peaked your curiousity and what really didn’t support your project. Focus on your routine, follow your internal GPS and recenter daily. The rest will fall into place.

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POST 44

SELF – PRESERVATION

JANUARY 10TH 2023

Refinement requiries observation of self and your surroundings. You can’t learn what you aren’t exposed to. Accesability, open mindedness, and accountability are neccesaties to evolve. Broadaning your views immediately brings to your attention how unpredictable ths world we live in really is. When this happens remind yourself a little angst is a must for growth. If you knew what was coming the experience couldn’t move you forward. There would be no lesson to learn. A little push and pull with oneself is required to expand “you”. It is common to feel a desire to retreat back to the safety of your normal. Keeping control. Guaranteed predictability. Trust me when i say whats on the other side of the obstacle you want. If you can resist the urge to safeguard your emotions the reward is unexplainable. Be open and allow your internal GPS ( spirit/soul) guide you on your adventure. Deal with your trialsl and errors when they come, not a second before. Take (most) everything in and purge what’s not for you. Condition yourself to understand pain and dissapointment are a part of life. They are inevitable. Don’t miss the amazing stuff inbetween by worrying about what could happen, but hasn’t. We have to live to find out what’s good and what’s bad. It’s how we gain our knowledge to make choices. The key is self-preservation. Don’t look at self-preservation as full protection for your emotions. Instead what if it’s a equation for life. Be willing to live if you want true self-preservation. The definition of preservation: The activity of processing something valued alive, intact or free from damage and decay. When you choose to connect mind and soul and let your walls crumble to start anew you will find your value (purpouse) for why you are alive. Study yourself for damage and decay so you can stop it early. All of which are the activity that keeps you intact and on target. Instead of settling for stagnant practice the art of self – preservation. You are important to many. Become comftorable knowing you are important to self more than anyone or anything else.

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Post 44

ANALYZE YOUR LIFE

JANUARY 9TH 2023

There is no better time than now to analyze your life. See what you have allowed in and what you need to take out; get rid of. Just as a business you need to close out your year. Inspect your losses and gains. Notice where you have gaps that negativity has crept into. Evaluate any negative energy that you are the source of and figure out how to turn it into positivity. Study who is in your life. What influence do they have on your exsistence. Have you challenged yourself or played it safe? Are you open to stepping out of your comfort zone this year and see where it takes you? Desiring to tap into your full potential? Making the effort of your choices count. You are the only one with full authority over your thoughts and actions. This year only carry over your gains. Leave the losses in 2022 and don’t revisit them. Embrace the lessons from the bad and celebrate every piece of the good. Shoot for a positive and prosperous year ahead.

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Post 43

REFINING

January 6th 2023

In the definition of refine it states to make small changes via an idea, theory, or method. The meaning of these three are:

  1. Idea: a thought or suggestion as to a possible course of action
  2. Theory: a set of principals on which the practice of an activity is based
  3. Method: orderliness of thought or behaviour, systematic planning or action
  • Principles – a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of beliefs or behaviour or reasoning
  • Systematic – done or acting according to a fixed plan or system

A foundation to practice an activity requiring orderliness of thoughts or behaviours. Your thoughts and ideas require being in order and having knowledge of the activity/behaviour you are fixing to practice. This builds your foundation for success. First you have to khow what you want to accomplish. Second, research, research and more research. Don’t repeat what others have done. You are unique therfore your plan should be as individual as you. Following anothers path can work for a bit, but in the end it will only bring stagnation. Besides you don’t want to miss the reward of self satisfaction. Last step, complete the task; refine. Remember it’s improving with small changes one task at a time. Don’t forget to sit with your accomplishment for a minute before beggining your next objective.

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